It's so quiet in my apartment. This past Friday was my last day with my students. I promised myself a week ago that I wouldn't cry, at least not in front of my students. I did my lessons, explaining to each of my classes that today was my last day and I thanked them for the honor of teaching them this past year and that I hope to see them next year. One of my students, a British senior who took me on a tour my first day and has consistently been a kindness and bright light in my life, hugged me and said it has been an honor to know me and that I am an amazing person and an amazing teacher and that it is his every hope that our paths cross again. I said goodbye to all of my colleagues, and thanked them for making me feel so welcome. Then I taught my last class. My last class which was with the first teacher/ person I met here, my first friend. These students were so sweet to me that I felt at peace that even though I was nervous and to some extent afraid, everything was going to be just fine. So at the end of the class the teacher allowed me to 'give a speech'. I definitely wasn't ready for that. My voice shook as I thanked them for being a part of making my dream come true. For being a part of what has been the greatest year of my life. I felt my eyes water and took a deep breath. 'Thank you' was all I could say. We took a picture and I walked out of the building regulating my breath and hoping to God that I get to walk back through those doors again.
I am accepted to the program for next year, but the only information I really have is that I will be in the same area. I am not sure if this means I will be here at JB Darnet, or in the bigger town of Limoges. I want to state very clearly that I really hope I return here to St Yrieix. I love this town, I love this school, I love my colleagues, and the students. I love so much about this place. I really could live here. Small town and all. It would make me so happy. Limoges is a bus/ train ride away and nearly everywhere I could want to go is a bus/ train ride from there. I have friends here now, genuine friends who were really sad that I am leaving. My roommate, Lionel, who is pretty much my best friend here. Lionel has shown me such kindness and is a pretty awesome wingman...even though he had no idea what the term meant. I have made another friend through him and I adore him wholeheartedly. I am grateful every day for everything that is happening in my life and it is going to be hard to say goodbye (if only for a few months).
This year has been such an adventure and I am so grateful that I have been able to travel as a part of it. So as I approached my last vacation I decided to go to a part of this country that I hadn't visited yet. I visited Bordeaux, wine country. I am not typically a fan of wine, however, I wanted to explore a bit. So I booked a trip and included a half day excursion to some vineyards. I wasn't expecting to enjoy Bordeaux very much, but it seemed like a cool place to go. So when I arrive, the bus parking was in a part of town covered in graffiti and I had to walk quite a ways to my hostel. (I am addicted to staying in hostels at this point, it is the only way I will stay now.) However, as I continued to walk I began to see these beautiful doorways, and the exquisite architecture, and the river. I had no idea so my smile just kept getting bigger and bigger as I walked. There was so much diversity there. I finally found my hostel (which was mere meters from a small wine museum. It was just a door, but as I was welcomed in it looked like I was walking into a castle where the hallway was made of stone. I mentioned it and the hostel manager informed me it used to be a wine house. That's why all of the roads next to the river run perpendicular to it so that the wine merchants could just roll the barrels straight onto the ships at the docks. It was a great hostel. I ate pizza at this little whole in the wall pizza place and chatted with the owner, who had traveled all over the world with the military but decided to return to his roots in Bordeaux to follow his true passion of making pizza.
As I went to sleep that night I decided to catch up on a bit of Walking Dead since I can't access it on the school server. As I was in the middle of an episode I heard a man next to me snoring...loudly. There were about 12 of us in there and it was so loud it drowned out Rick. I looked over, but I brought headphones for a reason. I saw a man toss his hands in the air, get up and attempt to wake the snoring man up. The snoring man freaked out and started swinging. A string of expletives and a lot of confusion started spewing from the poor guy. Wanting no part of the drama, I shrugged and went back to my episode. The guy went back to his bed and the snoring man was still there just completely confused. Eventually, he went back to sleep...and back to snoring. I woke up the next morning and before I was even dressed the snoring guy approached me and after asking if I spoke English, asked me what had happened. I gave him a brief summary.
"Was it that bad?"
"Yeah."
"I had no idea what was going on man I just felt this dude's hand heavy on my chest and I freaked." "Yeah, I caught that part. You were screaming at him. I mean I don't blame either of you."
"Well, did I stop snoring?"
"Yup...for about ten minutes."
He started laughing and explained he takes medication for his narcolepsy that makes him snore, but he had no idea it was that bad. Well, I became friends with the guy and ended up hanging out with him and his friends over the course of the next two days. I visited the several different sectors of the town, which are divided by the century they were built. I fell in love with Bordeaux. Marking something off my Bucket List, I had a fish pedicure where the little fish eat the dead skin off your feet. It tickled. It tickled so badly. We visited a wine school where they served wine for mere Euros a glass and it was good. I also had the best grape juice I have ever tasted in my life. In an unrelated event, I also had the best kebab I have had in France. And the best pizza. They do food well there in Bordeaux. It was sad when I had to say goodbye to that beautiful city.
I didn't really have plans for the second week until another one of the assistants, Daniel (who also happens to be a gifted cinematographer), offered the possibility of seeing some castles. I, of course, said yes. So we made plans to visit Orléans and then Blois. I would have been happy with Orléans because there are things there from my favorite person in history; Joan of Arc. Daniel was an excellent traveling companion and we looked at as much of the historical sites as was possible. On his tour Daniel even made friends with some of the language assistants there and we had dinner together, where I had raclette for the first tim (SO good).
We visited two castles; Chateau Royale and Chateau Chambord. Mom and I watch "Reign" together so it was really cool to see the actual court where all of the stories took place. They really loved having their names on everything. Then of course we went to the highlight of my trip; Chateau Chambord. It is one of the castles that they based Belle's Castle on and it was so incredibly beautiful. It also helped make sense of why people wore these furs and wools all the time...it was SO cold in the castle. It was such a wonderfully magical experience. Did I sing "Beauty and the Beast" from the top of the castle? Yes...yes I did.
You see, "Beauty and the Beast" is my favorite Disney movie...of all time. Of all time. When I was younger I was bullied a lot for being a bookworm and smart. So I was a bit of an outcast. So to see a movie where she was bullied and outcast for being smart and reading a lot? I loved that movie. So when Beast saw that, she too, was an outcast and paid attention to her passions and gave her the library and listened and fought with her and beside her and for her? Oh, it made sense to me why they fell in love. I love that movie. So when I realized I would be in France, the setting of my favorite movie, when the live action came out I freaked out. It was...faulty, but still quite wonderful. Plus I saw it with my wonderful new friend, Flavia. Flavia is a surveyant here from Italy and wants to watch movies in English to improve her English but nobody would go with her. So, of course I was more than happy to.
It was because of her and one of my students that I was invited over to school housing to sing. Yeah, sing. Somehow (probably because of Lionel) word had gotten around that I could sing. After singing for a group of the girls there, I forgot how much I love singing. So one of my students that plays the guitar begged me to come the next week and sing with her. She sent me a list of songs and that's what we did; we sang. I forgot what that was like. I hated my voice for so long after puberty that I forgot how much I loved to sing. I sing all the time when I am alone. I kind of turn into a karaoke superstar when I am alone in the apartment. I don't typically sing in front of other people though. I loved hanging out with Kelsey, who is such a gifted singer because we sang all the time. That woman can harmonize like a boss and we just...sang. I don't do karaoke very often because I feel inadequate, but I will, on occasion. So to see these girls in awe when I sang along to a song on my phone...was a great feeling. So I sang with my students.
Then on my last day I was hanging out with some students form my Senior (Terminale) class that I had grown particularly fond of after eating lunch with them. So...it had gotten around that I sang so they begged me as a parting gift. "You should be in musicals," he said. The same British young man who had become such an encouragement to me. I kinda shrugged. I miss theater too. I wished them all the best as they went off to their classes. As they said goodbye and I was alone in the apartment. I walked back to my room and stepped out to the balcony. The very same spot that I had cried happy tears my first week here and I cried again. I let my sadness and my joy bubble over and I cried. I feel my heart break in waves and pieces and I smile. It's not a forever goodbye.
I am going on vacation tomorrow, so I will have more adventures to write of, but I have no more classes. That makes me sad, but not too sad. I don't know if I'll return here, but I certainly hope that I do. I hope so hard that I do. In any case, it is not my last time in the halls of JB Darnet. Even if I'm not posted here next year, I will definitely be visiting. That is the one thing I know for certain.
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